[nsfw] Adventure High: Looking for Feedback

galdon Posts: 258Member
Hello again everyone. So, this is the thread for that game I had made that was causing me some grief in the other thread. I figure I may as well try to learn what I can from this game so I can apply it to my normal work. If there is anything. It's entirely possible it's only popular for the niche interest and without it could have bombed like the rest of my stuff. xD

I'm not sure if it's okay to link directly to it or not; I re-read the rules and did not see any mention of mature content. So that I don't cause any trouble for the forum if it was just left out of the rules due to it not having been thought of at the time (I know some web-hosts are finicky about linking directly to nsfw material, and I don't know what host this forum uses), I'm going to link to my other pseudonym's newgrounds account instead of to the game directly.  

http://hypnochanger.newgrounds.com/

So, this game is sort of a mix between visual novel and RPG. The game kind of got away from me though; at first it was going to be fairly straight forward, focusing on a mind control niche since as a hobbyist hypnotist I have a fair number of online friends with that interest who have been wanting a game based around it, and I was a game developer with nothing better to do.

The main character being basically a villain lead me to consider other games with morality systems and how restricted the stories tend to be in them. (Often, games like that have a single plot, and you will play through it with your alignment basically being little more than flavoring) So, I decided to try adding multiple major plots depending on if you are good or bad.

Which then lead me to consider how many games with a morality system treat the most good, and most evil paths as the only possible alignments; with the middle alignment usually not having any real benefit because the designers assume you will go for one extreme or the other. So, I started working out plans for multiple story branches from those extremes towards the middle again. Long story short (too late) I've sort of gone from making a game to appeal to a specific niche to trying to make as good a game as I can that also appeals to a specific niche. 

As much as feedback from typical players helps though; there are some things that game designers/game design enthusiasts might be able to give more detailed feedback on. As I would like to be able to translate some of what I'm doing right to normal projects I can show off to anyone, and fix anything that might be hurting the game so I don't accidentally carry those problems with me to my other projects. Also, it would also be helpful to know exactly how normal people would react to the game so I can get a baseline to start from when deciding which of my RL friends it would be safe to show the game to.

One obvious thing I can say I do have plans to fix is the male/female ratio for the cast of characters. Mostly the imbalance has been an art problem. Every guy I draw seems to end up looking like a girl for some reason. Been trying to fix that problem before adding any more male characters. It took me literally hours of redrawing Mr. Drape's face/head before he stopped looking like an old lady to me. 

Comments

  • NosyArgentCommanderNosyArgentCommander Posts: 210Member
    edited February 2016
    @Galdon: I have plenty of feedback, it will all be constructive criticism, hope you don't mind. p

    General
    A.)
    If you want to keep this game a secret, try to be more discrete about it.

    In your first topic, you openly claimed that you "just released the second version yesterday on Newgrounds and it has more than 7k views!". That made the search trivial. We just had to look for a kinky game released that day with a lot of views that says something like "v2" or "1.2". There was only ONE game that fitted that description, and it was on the main page.

    Next time, try to be more vague. Don't include any number, and NEVER include a date.

    B.)
    I don't like the bomb as the first enemy. Don't ask me why, but he doesn't seem to be "generic" enough. I know you want to have an important role in the game, but it just look out of place.

    Gameplay

    C.)
    Try to avoid false decisions. There are times where you pretend you are giving the player an option, when you obviously don't. For example, when Val asks you to be your partner. That's just annoying.

    D.)
    I strongly suggest you avoid using the notes as "event triggers". On my first run I collected all the notes before doing anything else. This locked out of the heroic path (because Sarah was not going to get hypnotized), and it also locked me out of the bad path (because I missed all the opportunities to slave Val). As a general rule, Event Triggers should be repeatable or locked until they can/can't serve their purpose. Otherwise, things like my first run happen.

    E.)
    The battle system is REALLY boring. I love the idea that the main character is not a fighter, but you really need to make the "debuffer" role engaging. Otherwise, players are left with a crappy main character.

    F.)
    If you want to imitate Earthbound's mob behavior, then reduce the chances of random battles AND give a player an instant win BEFORE starting the battle transition. Starting a battle just to insta-win it gets really annoying really fast.

    Dialogue

    G.)
    Using your psychic powers on the over-world feels random at times. For example, why can't I use my power on Julia AFTER we have had our first conversation? It's not like she has any kind of protection against me.

    H.)
    If you don't do anything after casting CONFUSE on the over-world, the conversation ends in a completely different way. Yet, the game assumes it ended in the most traditional path. (example: Julia thinks you made a deal with her) To avoid adding more writing-load, I think that those conversations should just repeat itself afterwards.

    Plot

    H.)
    The way to Brainwash Cassandra is waaaaaaaaaay over the top. You heal hear until she turns into a cow? What the hell? Since when does your healing powers have the strength to change someone's outfit into something ridicule? While I like the idea of "heal them, gain their trust, then betray them", this made no fucking sense at all.

    D.)
    You may need to work on Mr.Drape. He is apparently a very important character, yet we never get to know him. He is incredibly shallow for what appears to be one of the "big bads".
    Post edited by NosyArgentCommander on
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  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    I don't mind criticism; except for criticism that comes with gunblade stabbings. Short of that, I try to do my best to take criticism as a chance to improve, rather than as an attack on myself. 

    A) Well the vagueness was more for the potential of my parents coming across the thread than anything else. I was kind of banking on the idea that if they found the thread, they would not find it immediately. Thus, they would not have the ability to just go look on Newgrounds for the game that is currently popular. That's kind of become irrelevant though since there are apparently a ton of galdons running around now being more relevant to google than I am. 

    B) To be honest; the bomb enemy started of purely as a pun. I've mostly kept it in that spot because being out of place and odd ended up fitting a plot I am going to go into later that I haven't really had a chance to start including yet. 

    C) For the most part, I have avoided those kinds of decisions; I think that instance is basically the only time you get a false decision that I can think of; but it does have an impact on Val's opinion of you. I can see how that might set a precedent in the player's mind to expect false decisions, so I probably should edit that scene to avoid it. 

    D)  I'm not entirely clear on how you got locked out of both paths that way; if anything, going through and collecting all the notes as soon as possible would put you onto the heroic path. The way I have the event triggers set up, each scene has certain prerequisites that need to be met before it can occur. The only scenes that can be blocked by progress would be the first evil path scene not triggering if you have triggered the first good path scene, and vise versa. Unless you meant to say that you did hypnotize Sarah, in which case you would still be able to get on the bad path through Julia. 

    I am planning to implement a neutral starting path though that will trigger if you make progress like the Heroic path but have not put enough girls under to trigger the bad path. 

    E) I'm hoping that kind of fixes it's self as I finish making more spells. The current effective spell list is pretty small which makes most choices fairly trivial in combat. 

    F) I have experimented with messing with the mob encounter chance when introducing the Berserker in this update. I'll hopefully be able to implement that in the next update. 

    G) Mostly, you can't cast on Julia outside of the first meeting mostly to avoid messing some of the more complex functions she's a part of up. I made some bad design choices when getting her intel system set up originally and I'm still kind of "detangling" it so it's safe to allow casting on her during conversations past the first one. 

    H) I keep meaning to fix that then forgetting. >< I have a plan for her saying something different after returning from being confused. I should write myself more notes. 

    H2) The reason for that is the Boost spell isn't actually a support/healing spell. It's a physical spell that allows you to modify the body. Due to how large a change is made in that instance, it does take multiple castings to build up the energy for the effect to occur.

    The difference between Boost and a normal healing spell is mentioned in three different places in the game so far though (twice in the heroic plotline, and once in the Support class if you attend it without Sarah or Val in the party), and is also hinted at by the spell being in the row with physical magic instead of support. It does seem to come out of left field though if you happened not to see any of those scenes prior to going for Cassandra. 

    D2) I am planning to flesh his character out more as he grows more involved. A lot of what he does in the early part of the game is behind the scenes so you don't get to see it directly. Once I start getting to the mid-game I'm planning to have him be a more active character in the plot. 

    Anyways, thanks for all the feedback. There are definitely a few things in there that I'm going to need to remember to fix for the next version. xD
  • vlademir1vlademir1 Posts: 424Member
    Having a friend who is into the whole hypno fetish thing, I'll have him give this a look and try to get some feedback to give you.  Personally I get a little too weirded out by the entire notion to be able to give any uncolored feedback.
    I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds. Look upon my works and despair!

    Truth is never lying right there on the surface for everyone to quickly find, it requires dedication, the right tools and time.
  • KSquaredKSquared Posts: 27Member
    I actually feel like this is one of these games where false choice sort of works. Yeah, it's bad in general, but here it sort of fits the theme, and none of the ones I've encountered are the sort that make me shake fist at "lazy developer!" Although, having [i]some[/i] impact down the line would be nice. Like having a consequence for not choosing to go with Val right away.

    I've encountered two major annoyances in general gameplay, both to do with traversing the dungeons. The biggest one is monsters retreating. It's great that I don't have to waste my time on combat, but it takes forever to just go into the scene, go out of the scene. This isn't worth a transition. At most, show that event once, then just skip monster fights with underleveled monsters all together. It already conveyed to the player that there is nothing to worry about at this floor. Might as well not waste the time.

    The second problem is with returning from the dungeon. You can skip forward at the entrance, albeit, only to two points that I've found. But you can't do a fast return. Again, at least, no way that I've found. Maybe have notes and sigils turn into fast return portals after they are picked up?

    Overall, the gameplay works pretty well to fill in the gaps in the dialog-maze story. The story and subject matter is definitely what attracts the fan base, but there is enough gameplay to prevent it from burning through their interest in five minutes. It's a delicate balance between having too much and too little filler, and I think this game mostly has it right. Just needs a few tweaks to the mechanics and more content.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    @vlademir1 Thanks, and I understand that. Trying to force one's self to play something they are uncomfortable with isn't very fun. (With the exception being horror games, but this isn't meant to be a horror experience)

    @ksquared Pretty much all choices; even ones that are minor, do have a cumulative impact later on, if that helps. All dialogue choices have an effect on one or more of the involved characters' attitude stats that are used to gauge how a character feels about you. Some personal scenes have prerequisites of characters liking you, or trusting you by a certain amount before they can trigger.

    I also have plans for if you pick options that cause those stats to go down too far, alternate side-plots related to the character disliking you and becoming more antagonistic towards you. 

    Monster retreating is a new feature so, like I'd said in my post above, it's definitely going to need tweaking. xD I'll try to work out some improvements to it in the next update.

    There actually is a quick return option in the dungeon; pressing enter at any time outside of battle warps you back to the school. Jane mentions it during her first class before you can enter the dungeon freely. 

    I haven't put a lot of effort into deliberately balancing the dungeon progress against the story beyond trying to gradually increase how far along you need to get to unlock new scenes, so I guess I hit that balance by accident. I should probably try to stick to that ratio going forward then. xD Anyways, thanks for the feedback as well. 
  • KSquaredKSquared Posts: 27Member
    Tells you how much attention I pay in classes, doesn't it? XD

    It's weird that all of the game runs from 0-3 and GUI buttons, but dungeon quick return is a separate key. This is going to throw off a lot of the players. Yes, we should pay more attention to prompts, but we aren't going to. If your intention is to allow player to leave dungeon at any time outside of combat, a GUI button might make that clear to the player. Yes, extra interface work. I hate it too.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    Actually, the Enter key has a few uses in the game. In addition to returning you to the school in the dungeon, it also acts as a fast forward button during conversations, and in the bedroom it opens the party management menu.

    I am though planning to create a better menu screen that can be opened anywhere with more options, which will include returning home from the dungeon. At which point the enter key would just open that menu rather than instantly warping you out of the dungeon. So, in a way there will be a GUI button for it later on. 
  • NotPlatoNotPlato Posts: 397Member
    I spend about an afternoon playing both versions to see the differences, seems like it's mostly content. 

    For my first few things I'll say, I do, to a degree, enjoy the self aware writing. You could probably use an editor/co-writer though. Not just in respect to that [since there's a severe case of the condition I'd call 'smut writing' even in ordinary scenes], I mean overall, but the "Click the icons" "What? What icons?" dialogue falls quite flat after the initial "Curse you, disembodied voice!"
    Additionally, having given the game a go down both 'paths' [not 100%, but enough] and I have a distinct.. view, that you have, at this point, an opportunity to remove the smut from the game and make it clean while preserving the core of your story. Your initial smut prototype game was a hit, but I don't know if in your position I'd commit to finishing a game that way. At very least, I'd have an option to have it enabled or disabled [and even have that impact aspects of the story/writing if you so choose]. This being said, the furthest this game goes at the moment is some characters showing you their boobs. Walkthrough says there's a make out as well? There's also a girl who you may have the opportunity to turn into plastic. The other stuff I hardly blink at, that last one's a bit strange. 

    I find it real interesting how going along the evil path benefits you in terms of having direct control over the attacks of your allies, and then along the good path you only control yourself in serving the support role. However, I feel like having your allies 'elemental' attacks disrupt your debuffs is a bit harsh a restriction. In addition, I dislike how most abilities are out-and-out outmoded by other abilities as characters level up. At very least, they appear to be. Try perhaps to have all skills stand on par to eachother, and have them scale equally as characters level up. If they're only differentiated in power, you're doing something wrong. I wonder if you've playtested? If you do, I'd advise watching what abilities get used. I ended up resorting to one or two abilities a character, and any other attack I tried was inferior. 

    Welcome to The Tangent Hour. I, NotPlato, will be your host tonight.
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  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    I could probably use a co-writer to catch my typos and awkward wording; unfortunately I have never had any luck at all with teaming up with people. Literally every time it starts off with the person eager to work on the project, then a few weeks to a couple months later and they are on a perpetual hiatus due to one thing or another.  I have kind of grown rather wary of relying too much on someone else, as too many projects of mine have ended up falling through due to a team member not doing their part. 

    I have considered the possibility of creating a clean version of the game, as it would be more approachable to people who don't like mature content, and would be sharable in more places; but I don't quite trust myself not to accidentally leave something in, or mess something up at some point and wind up releasing the uncensored version as the clean version and end up with major problems. 

    The plastic thing does sound odd out of context; it's less to do with plastic it's self, and more to do with her wanting to be like a doll and becoming curious if one of your spells could be used for that. Which is connected to that character's personality and background and not just something completely random. 

    For character personalities, I basically decide on for each character certain behavioral details, such as how they like to be perceived by strangers, how they like to be seen by friends, specific things that they like, really like, dislike, or hate, and what motivation they have for being at the school in the first place. Then use those things as a guide on how they should act in scenes they are involved in. That way I can hopefully avoid having a character break-character simply because the plot, or "plot" demands it. 

    Later on in the heroic path it will be possible to control allies in combat; the formula for whether you can control a character is based on their obedience and trust. It's easy to get high obedience playing the villain route; but it takes time to build up enough trust for characters to wait for your orders instead of acting on their own in battle. 

    I am trying to keep the spells balanced; lower level spells do less damage, but also are faster to cast, and use less stamina. At present, stamina isn't really a major concern, so you can spam your strongest spell repeatedly, but I am hoping as I fill out the spell list more, I will be able to fine-tune the ratios between stamina used and damage delt so that it has a better balance. 

    Only being able to inflict one status ailment at a time is kind of a coding skill limitation. When I first started, I had no idea how to handle multiple status ailments at the same time. I've gotten better and now I can sort of visualize a way to handle it, but it would be amazingly tedious to re-work the system to allow for multiple status ailments at this point. The fact that the AI can mess up your debuffs though, I think, does provide some incentive to work at becoming better friends with your team mates on the heroic path and build up more trust with them. So, I'm not really sure if it would be worth it to change at this point.
  • NotPlatoNotPlato Posts: 397Member
    On top of everything else, using the combat interface is kind of tedious. I'd like to be able to do it all with hotkeys.
    Welcome to The Tangent Hour. I, NotPlato, will be your host tonight.
    I am become moar educated. This isn't even muh final for(u)m.
    In the winding gravel road of literary theory, it is impossible to leave 'no stone unturned'.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    I have no idea how to do it with hot keys. Not counting the flee and rest actions, the spells are on a 4x7 grid. There's just no room on the keyboard to make a matching grid unless you turn the keyboard sideways and used 1-7, q-u, a-j, and z-m. And that would be amazingly unintuitive. 
  • @galdon:
    "I'm hoping that kind of fixes it's self as I finish making more spells. The current effective spell list is pretty small which makes most choices fairly trivial in combat."


    No offense, but I think that's one of the worst things you could do. :p

    If you ask me, the problem with the current battle system is that none of the combat spells feel uninteresting. You can not stack them, you can not use in interesting ways, and they don't feel unique. They mostly weaken your enemy, and that's about it.

    Instead of adding more, you should focus on making the current spells REALLY work. To give the battles a proper flow. See how can you make them interact, how can you use them to make the plays either proactive (a.k.a. try to lock the enemy before they can do anything) or reactive (a.k.a. trying to guess the enemy moves and casting defensive stuff accordingly).
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  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    edited February 2016
    What I mean is, for example for a direct damage spell like Burst vs Fire Axe, I could right now increase the stamina cost of Fire Axe to make it feel more costly and make Burst feel more viable so the choice between them would seem to matter more... but then, there are 5 more levels of destructive magic that will be added over time. If the 2nd level spell seems expensive to use, the 4th level spell would be neigh unusable and the 7th would be right out. 

    For buffs and debuffs, there will be a greater variety of options as the spell list fills out. One spell that I am working on for the next update will be an "annoying" spell that causes mild discomfort. It does basically nothing on it's own; but does bump an existing debuff off the target as a result, and can be used in conjunction with the main character's conversion series of spells (The first of which is the Speed conversion) to give buffs to allies without them having to be inflicted with a more dangerous ailment. 

    I'm not sure if debuffs being stackable will really make them interact any more. The more spells you can stack, the less you have to think about which debuffs are the most useful for any given situation. A lot of games I play have basically a "standard debuff rotation" to keep the same set of debuffs on any monster at any time because that combination of debuffs is useful for every situation ever. By making the player pick one debuff, they have to decide which of the debuffs would benefit them most in a specific situation.
    Post edited by galdon on
  • MixedUpzombiesMixedUpzombies Posts: 67Member
    I played this while drunk the other night it was alright. I totally missed the whole press enter dungeon thing as well. Your game deals with morality and some characters have severe issues with you controlling others and others just see as it as a passing phase of learning magic. While there are some things I think you could have done differently just that alone puts you leaps and bounds above similar games you might find NewGrounds. 


  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    edited February 2016
    I think I am starting to understand why many games highlight controls mentioned in conversation in a different color. xD Sadly, the way Stencyl handles text makes it impossible to make mid-line color changes... (Really stencyl doesn't support text very well in general) Not sure what I can really do to make it more noticeable when a tutorial mentions a button command.
    Post edited by galdon on
  • NotPlatoNotPlato Posts: 397Member
    Maybe a help menu? For example, I could only mute the game because I took a guess it'd be the 'm' button. Nowhere did I see that actually pointed out. I'm sure there's a bunch of people who played it and wanted to mute it but couldn't.
    Welcome to The Tangent Hour. I, NotPlato, will be your host tonight.
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    In the winding gravel road of literary theory, it is impossible to leave 'no stone unturned'.
  • vlademir1vlademir1 Posts: 424Member
    Doesn't Stencyl use a bitmap font system?  You could try having a 256 character extended ANSII base, but use the images in the 128-256 area to display button images or have them be a differently colored mirror of the 0 to 127 area.  It's been a while since I played around with Stencyl, so I could be confusing it with a different system for doing the same kind of development.
    I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds. Look upon my works and despair!

    Truth is never lying right there on the surface for everyone to quickly find, it requires dedication, the right tools and time.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    @NotPlato Yeah, a help menu probably would help. I'll try to include one that can be accessed with the menu screen when I get that working.

    @vlademir1 I don't know if that is possible to do, but I have no idea how it would work. The draw text box displays literally the text you type in, so even if you uploaded a font with special characters that look like text in a different color I'm not sure how to make it use them. The closest I've figured out to having various text colors is changing the font between lines; but that is finicky and has a tendency to occasionally cause all the text on the screen start being a random mix of the two fonts if the slightest thing is off. 
  • AmmypendentAmmypendent Posts: 79Member
    Considering how extensive this game was made in Stencyl, I'm pretty certain you can fairly quickly learn the ropes of GameMaker:Studio and deal with much less limitations.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    Trying to learn a more flexible dev kit might be helpful for future projects, but so much of the framework for this game is based entirely on working around Stencyl's various limitations I would basically have to rebuild the game from scratch if I did that. Even assuming it would be faster due to having already designed it once and already having the art ready, it would still likely take several months of work to just catch up to the point I am at now. 
  • FilthyCasual Posts: 258Member
    edited March 2016
    Do you think there's a way you could make an attack progress bar, similar to Child of Light? Since the PC uses a lot of speed debuff spells, it would be cool to see the effects displayed visually instead of just the raw numbers.

    EDIT: If you do end up having everything accessible through hot keys, make sure its mapped so that a person can comfortably use only one hand.
    Post edited by FilthyCasual on
  • NotPlatoNotPlato Posts: 397Member
    @FilthyCasual ;
    There is a progress marker for that, it's more of a numerical timer. One of the issues is that it's usually at -30 before it remembers to get you to do a thing.
    Welcome to The Tangent Hour. I, NotPlato, will be your host tonight.
    I am become moar educated. This isn't even muh final for(u)m.
    In the winding gravel road of literary theory, it is impossible to leave 'no stone unturned'.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    edited March 2016
    The reason the progress bar hits negative numbers is actually because the number goes down based on your speed, and it frequently doesn't land on exactly zero. I am planning to switch the hp and action meters into bars once I get some time to work out the exact length/unit ratio for the action bar since each spell has a different delay, which will keep those negative numbers from being noticable.

    I am going to try to keep the controls fairly localized to an area that can be handled with one hand. Most of the controls so far only use the lower number pad, and arrow keys.
    Post edited by galdon on
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    edited July 2016
    So, I've made a fair bit of progress on the game in the last four months or so. I actually have a real menu now instead of that temporary menu that only works in one room in the game. xD So, any feedback on how the game is coming along and if it looks like it's heading in the right direction would be good to get.

    Incidentally, amongst the updates, I added in a new system for weaknesses and resistances. Elemental resistances is one, but also things like slimes being resistant to all attacks that are physical, or some monsters being extra vulnerable to certain status ailments. It just so happened, however, that since I had designed the monsters before adding that system in, it just happens that 90% of the monsters in the game are weak to fire so Sarah can one shot almost everything with her fire magic. 

    I was going to make some new monsters and insert them into the existing floors so as to prevent Sarah from being too overpowered, but then the idea occurred to me to leave it as is, and include a side plot where Sarah becomes convinced that she is more powerful than she is. Which actually makes a fairly effective segue into setting up the reveal for her backstory that I've hinted at a couple times so far. 

    So, I am wondering; would be be acceptable design-wise to leave the early floors imbalanced in order to set up this kind of story sequence, or would the imbalance be more distracting than it is worth?
    Post edited by galdon on
  • vlademir1vlademir1 Posts: 424Member
    I'd personally say it's perfectly acceptable to do something like that, especially if doing so leads to a solid character growth moment.
    I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds. Look upon my works and despair!

    Truth is never lying right there on the surface for everyone to quickly find, it requires dedication, the right tools and time.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    edited July 2016
    I think it's a fairly solid character growth moment that it leads to. Then again, being the person who wrote it probably makes me bias in that regard. It could easily also be cliche or not as well executed as I hope. xD I'll include a detailed summary of the scenes in a spoiler tag.

    Spoiler:

    The scene is preceded by a few hints about her backstory up to this point; three different scenes have the potential depending on choices of her mentioning her home as "housing" instead of "her house". and when you go inside her mind, it takes the form of a house in the wilderness.

    I'm going to have the scene miss-able if you go too deep in the dungeon and start facing monsters she isn't able to easily defeat. So, if you haven't reached those floors yet, and she has high affection towards you she will approach you to ask you to accompany her outside the town so she can visit the burned remains of her childhood home. 

    When the main character argues; she will point out that she easily slaughters everything in the dungeon and that he/she is just being  a coward. At that point you can agree to go or refuse. (if you refuse, she gets upset and says she's going home. She leaves the party, and becomes unavailable until a future scene where she was found injured outside of town and brought to Dr. Tiff's office)

    If you go along with her, the scene takes you to her old house. While there, she finds her old doll, and begins to reminisce about it, but is interrupted by a real version of the Bear Claw monster that was seen in her mind on the heroic route.

    Seeing the monster causes Sarah to become too panicked to get ready to fight, and ends up hiding under a ruined bed, leaving you to fight the monster alone. The fight is extremely one sided, unwinnable fight, and after losing, the scene resumes with the player unconscious and Sarah attacking the Bear Claw with her fire magic, and failing to cause it any damage due to it being a fire based monster it's self.

    The bear ignores Sarah's attempts to provoke or attack it, and turns it's attention toward the main character, intending to eat him/her. Sarah tries a more powerful spell in desperation  but fails to cause any damage again. Finally she begins to yell for someone to help before falling into a trance and casting a water spell on the Bear Claw and chasing it away.

    Once the Bear Claw is gone, she mentions that she wishes she could have done that years ago; but she is no good with elemental magic. Then she turns her attention to the main character and says she is glad Sarah has a brave friend like him/her and that she better get him/her back to town.

    The main character wakes up in his/her room, and notices Sarah there. She tells him/her however, that she is not Sarah, but Sarah's mom. She then un-possesses Sarah's body and takes on a ghost form. She explains that she has been waiting for Sarah to visit the house, in the hopes of seeing her grown up.

    She also says that she is happy she could protect her, but is ashamed of taking away her freedom by possessing her, even if it was temporary and that she can't bear to be around when Sarah wakes up. If you enslaved Sarah prior to that point, she will say she doesn't expect you to understand what she means... but that since you have been treating her well she isn't angry. (Since the scene depends on high affection from Sarah, you would have to have been treating her nicely in spite of enslaving her)

    The scene ends with her asking you to at least tell Sarah that she loves her. Once the scene concludes, Sarah will be able to cast the Bubble spell.
    Post edited by galdon on
  • NosyArgentCommanderNosyArgentCommander Posts: 210Member
    edited July 2016
    @Galdon: I was planning to PM you about this (I remember writing the message on Notepad, but I don't remember sending it to you), so forgive me if I am repeating myself.

    Have you considered starting a Patreon for this thing? After you posted this online, I checked up Newgrounds 18+ games (I got curious. The experience was really different from when I played them during my teenage years). I noticed most of them had sponsors, and at least one of them had a successful Patreons. Here is a link to their official page [somewhat NSFW], which also includes a link to their Patreon.

    If you try to play the original game, it looked atrocious. The game-play was also shallow as hell (move + collect, essentially second-hand animal crossing) and the sim-date dynamics were as basic as a sim-date can be. (You give gifts to the girls -> they fall in love with you -> they proceed to pleasure your pingus)

    And yet it got MANY newgrounders interested, about 800 patrons.

    Now, with the 2k/month they are receiving, they hired real artists, and the game looks one million times better. It stills plays like ass, and the sim-date dynamic has not improved one bit. But the graphics are nice and the fan-service looks actually good.

    A thunder rarely hits the same place twice, and most people who backed Pokkaloh are unlikely to back your Indy Eroge Flash Game as well. However, even if you get 80/month or 100/month, that's about 4 or 6 art commisions per month. Those baby steps could take you far.

    And if the Patreon fails... well, it's not like you are making a huge investment there. :p
    Post edited by NosyArgentCommander on
    I support NotPlatoSimulator2013 on Kickstarter, so should you.
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    I don't think I recieved a PM from you, so you aren't repeating yourself.

    I actually do have a patreon campaign. Though, the link to it is buried deep in the bottom of the game's description on newgrounds so it's probably not very visible. I had considered putting a patreon link in the game it's self, but I can't find any non-intrusive place to put it given that the game is fairly open ended and doesn't have a "that's all there is for now" screen. 

    A few months ago, I did start paying an artist to start upgrading the artwork. I've been getting the avatar art for about one or two characters a month upgraded so far. I'm figuring it probably won't start paying off until most of the artwork is replaced since the mix of old and new art probably looks bad. 
  • galdon Posts: 258Member
    edited June 15
    So... it's been almost a year since my last post. Been making updates to the game monthly, and I think the game has come a long way since last year. 

    In the last year, I've begun working with several artists to add more cutscene art, added a lot of new plotlines, some new characters, two "good endings" (Not main plotline endings, but 'secret' endings based on doing specific things to trigger them) that lead to a NG+ mode, and started a submissive plotline. 

    I was wondering if anyone felt like taking a look at what I've got now, and pointing out anything that I may be doing poorly, or things that could be done better. (on my profile the one labeled 'adventure high updated' is the most up to date version, as I don't upload a new version every month, but I do keep that particular version patched to the latest version.)

    Also, I do not know if this part would warrant it's own thread or not but the submissive plotline I added is creating an interesting design challenge. I was requested by more than a few people who are interested in mind control stuff to include something where the player is in the sub role without leading immediately to a bad end. 

    This is kind of an odd problem to work on in a game design perspective because agency is such an integral part of playing a game. If you take agency away, the game may as well be playing it's self. Which is why usually when the player loses a battle of will it ends in a bad end; the player no longer has agency and thus can't play anymore. 

    So far, the closest I can come up with for it is to take a page out of the terrible DM handbook and railroad the player hard on that plotline, by having all their choices be "Do what you are told, or be made to do what you are told";  but I dislike that solution on a neigh instinctual level because of it normally being terrible. xD
    Post edited by galdon on
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